Um...poop! - a scatological post


Well, I must say that as far as I'm concerned, there's an elephant in this health blog and it's time I addressed it. And that Elephant is poop. Kaka. Shat. Bowel movements. Dookie. Poo poo. Doody. Lincoln Logs. #2. Cosby Kids. (Worst one?) Stool. Feces. Crap. Sh1t. Etc etc etc etc etc etc.

First, this link, to the Bristol Stool Scale.

Next is Gillian McKeith's You Are What You Eat. I'm watching an episode right now with a vicar and a morbidly obese Scottish young mum. Gillian has them move in with her for a bit and does this hard core, "Look what you're eating nad what ti will do to you," sort of thing. She also tried to collect the stool samples of the guests. The vicar never gives her one. She has "artwork" in the bathroom. A plaster model of the ideal poop. (See #4 on the Bristol scale.) She also makes them do squats in the morning and hum, to get the belly a moving and a shaking, so that the waste can get a move on out of the system.

Then there's Oprah's regular guest, Dr Oz, who's (rightfully) obsessed with POOP. Have you seen him? It's funny. But what am I saying? For me, all poo-things are funny. I have an immature sense of humor that way.

I found this very informative and just a tad funny article on kaka called Everybody Poops, like a really funny children's book "Everyone Poops."

So, there's a few links about pooping. I always find that when I have a smoothie, I have a poop. (Hence all the recipes!) That's why fiber, whether from fruit or legumes or whatever, is very important. You should be pooping at least once a day. About 2 hours after every meal is ideal.

Okay, enough about poo-poo. I have to go have a bout of Tourrettes as Jon Miller and Joe Morgan trash talk my Sox on the Sunday ESPN. (I don' think such vehemence on my behalf is good for the dumps but whatevs.)