Attractive Actors Losing Lustre

July 29, 2006

So, here’s the mini-existential crisis I’ve been dealing with ever since Nate Corddry made it into Entertainment magazine:

Is every quirky-cute actor like him? Because if that’s the case, then every quirky-cute actor I’ve ever had a crush on (see previous posts about potential husbands including Ron Livingstone, Colin Firth and Matt Damon) loses their lustre. Because Nate isn't lustrous, he's just this guy who was in drama with me in high school, who, though he has apologized profusley for this, broke up with me on Valentine's Day. No big whoop. So, what are the ramifications of this realization that half my fantasy crushes are probably as disappointing and illustrious as old real-life crushes?

It simply means I’ll have to focus more of my fantasy attention on the silly athlete crushes--like Barry Zito & Gabe Kapler, Keven Garnett & the entire D&G wearing Italian soccer team since I have no comparable high school affairs to go on and ruin it for me.